Dear MCAT

Dear MCAT,

Lately, studying for the MCAT has felt a bit like standing at the base of a mountain. Every time I look up, I see just how much there is left to climb, and for a moment it feels impossible. But mountains feel that way, y’know? They’re supposed to.

So I decided to stop staring at the summit and just start walking.

I will finish Khan Academy. I will do daily CARS passages. I will spend 45 minutes with Anki every single day. Nothing fancy. Just consistent steps forward.

The truth is, I know I need to get this over with. What scares me is not the work itself – it’s the possibility that I could give it everything I have and still fall short. What if I get a bad score? What if medical schools don’t accept me? What if the life I’ve been working toward suddenly looks different than I imagined?

The anxiety can be crippling if I let it.

But fear has never been a good reason to stop moving.

I need to woman up and go after what I want.

Tomorrow, I’m going to print out posters and put my target score all over my room. I need constant reminders of what I’m working toward. More importantly, I need reminders of who I am. I am smart. I am capable. The MCAT is not some mythical beast sent to destroy my dreams. It’s an exam. A difficult one, sure, but still just an exam. And like every challenge before it, it can be overcome with enough patience, discipline, and work.

I know I feel drained right now. But this is nothing I haven’t experienced before. I’ve faced uncertainty before. I’ve faced obstacles before. I’ve survived every single one of them.

My goal is to take the MCAT on the last weekend of September.

I really hope I can do this.

There are people who believe in me. My family. My mentors. My friends. But most of all, younger me – the little girl who dreamed of becoming a scientist long before she knew what the journey would cost. She believed this future was possible, and I owe it to her to keep going.

One day at a time. One chapter at a time. One practice passage at a time.

Happy studying.

Edidiong C.